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alone vs lonely

My problem is I like being alone too much. I don’t hate people, I just can’t take them in large doses. I have a very small group of friends I see occasionally. I like to be alone with my thoughts and enjoy the world as it is.  Spending time by yourself, enjoying the world and organizing your thoughts can be very fulfilling. But sometimes i feel lonely and it sucks…

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Single 2.0

“You are single because this is the time that God is going to use you the most, where you’re going to learn about what you want in life, where you’re going to learn that independence comes from inside of you. This is where God is casting your mold. This is where He is shaping your weakness into strength. This is where He is gluing the pieces of your heart together in an entirely new shape so that everyone else in your life can see the light shine through the cracks”

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Singleness

“You’re single because you deserve to be alone. Not because you don’t deserve someone else to love you, but because you deserve to have time to love yourself and just yourself. Because you deserve to be the best possible version of you for everyone else in your life.”

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fixing things

“As a Christian, I know the first thing I should do when I see a red flag in my life is pray about it. But do I? Of course not. I’m too focused on fixing things by myself, laying them out in front of me and trying to figure out where I’m going next. I constantly forget that it’s not my road. I did not build it. I did not choose this path.”

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losing faith

As human beings, we are created with weakness. We are created to be imperfect. We are born with characteristics and traits that cause us to fail and to fall. As human beings, we have a tendency to immediately jump to the worst conclusions and lose hope quickly. I am a walking billboard for immediately losing faith when things don’t go my way.

Sex

“Ultimately, I think no matter what, if you remain single or get married, the devil will always use your sexuality against you and maybe against other people.”

“Remember A spouse is not a live in concubine at your beck and call”

Modesty

I have a lot of opinions on modesty….

I kind of agree with this video…

he’s telling the truth in order to understand modesty you have to understand how boys think but thats as far as it should go the rest should be between you and God. A girl should not moderate how she dresses to make boy “comfortable” around her. Lust towards a woman is a heart issue! Meaning a boy can lust regardless of what a girl is wearing. Its too much of a burden especially for a girl like me to feel like I have to dress to make someone else feel comfortable.

If God approves of what I’m wearing and i honestly feel comfortable in the clothes then who cares. If a girl walks in front of a boy and she is basically wearing nothing if he is respectful he will look down or look away while at the same time not judging her. Jesus never told people in the bible to go fix themselves and then maybe he will be kind and give them grace.

I used to be that girl who felt like I needed to dress extremely modest because God forbid I make someone uncomfortable. One day I was introduced to this new world of modesty and boys, I listened to a lot of sermons read a lot and I basically became a modesty pharisee. Judging myself and other girls and how people should dress but God was very gracious with me and he has given me a lot of wisdom along the way.

I think modesty is a two way street it really is for both the sexes. Lets get one thing out of the way, if someone does not know Jesus meaning they are not even a christian, you can’t hold them up to any christian standards also if someone just became a christian they need a lot of grace because they are still learning.

As for the rest of us who read the bible and call ourselves disciples of Jesus we all need to be humble, gracious and forgiving to one another. People really don’t like being told what to do and yes that includes me too! But if you think about it modesty is almost always 99% of the time blamed on women by christians.

Christian boys can I have a word with you please?

Do me a favor next time you judge a girl for not being modest enough why don’t you check your heart, remembering that lust is a heart issue, you can lust regardless of what a girl is wearing. So please don’t go around objectifying girls at church saying how uncomfortable they make you. If you are around christian girl who dressed in a way that makes you uncomfortable either stay away, lovingly confront them and or go to Jesus and ask him what to do because its not like he won’t understand. Don’t be a coward! And just think “oh well they should know better than to dress like that around us boys don’t they (girls)  know we are physical creatures!”

If you’ve ever thought that I’ll give you a moment to repent…….. if not….. you are a weak pathetic excuse of a so called christian “brother”  And boys do me a favor STOP calling non christian girls sluts and other unmentionable names, they don’t have the same standards as you and should not be held up to them.

Girls? a word?

Since when did tights become pants? if tights were pants they would be called pants!! please stop. I digress….

Honestly girls…. christian or not you can wear whatever you want to wear, you shouldn’t feel like you have to cover your body head to toe then you can be around christian men. Never forget real lust is a heart issue that cannot be fixed by telling girls what to wear. Sure you can fix the outside but the inside is what God cares about. So ask yourself one thing “Am i trying to fix a problem for someone else that only they can fix?”

Christian girls as we grow in our walk we should learn about boys and not pretend to be so ignorant sometimes. I honestly feel sorry for boys sometimes especially christian ones who are trying to be “pure.” Its really hard because anything can trigger a boy and thats something to be sensitive about. I think sometimes they get frustrated because sure they want to be around christian girls but its hard if there is no distinguishing factor between the way a christian girl dresses and they way a non christian girl dresses.

The way boys feel also has to do with their upbringing which may or may not have been legalistic. So a lot of grace has to be given to boys who approach modesty from a legalistic point of view, after all they weren’t born judging girls that way

Girls.. (and I’m talking to the serious disciples here not the pretend sunday christian and weekly atheist)

if you love your christian brothers think about what its like to be them, and consider how you dress. Its one thing to wear something you like and it makes you comfortable but its another thing to wear something stylish and pretend you’re comfortable while constantly adjusting your clothes….. hmmmm.

The most important thing is to talk to God about what he thinks of the way you dress because his opinion matters the most.

And girls? Please don’t judge other girls especially non christian girls its not your place.

Purity and modesty takes  team effort not just telling girls to dress a certain way

Check out this website it shows how boys think about a lot of things its really interesting

I HIghly recommend reading this 

And this 

And this Post

Okay one more Post

And a short sermon

The Gospel and Singleness

From the series “Lies We Believe About Sex, Singleness & Marriage”

Notes:

In the 1900s man woman relationships were centered around the family houses were even built so the family could be invloved

In the 1920s urbanization afforded young people to do things apart from their family, social outlets opened up the ability for sexual promiscuity

In the 50s Alfred Kinsey (pervert) used science as an excuse to practice sexual deviances. He set the way our public school teaches sex education. Hugh Hefner gave him a million dollars to conduct “research.” They have shaped much of the knowledge we have of sex today.

Fast forward to now where girls can buy the morning after pill at the drug store.

A pharmacist decided to do the drug profile of girls who buy the morning after pill. He has found that first they get the morning after pill then a couple of months later they get birth control, a couple of months later they get anti depressants, then a couple of months later they get weight control pills and then it just goes in to a plethora of medication they are getting to cope with sexual promiscuity.

We live in a culture that has gone sexually insane, as a single person if you look to your culture to get information you will not be taught well

Sexual temptation does not go away when you get married it can get worse because now you can imagine even better and you know how things work.